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Cape Town IX - Merry Christmas

This year The Hammond is spending Christmas in Cape Town... so with festive cheer I thought I'd post this cosy photo! Even though it is Summer time here!!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

And the First World War ended in... 1979

So said Joey Essex (whilst appearing on Celebrity Whatever It Is?)

Gormless, brain dead f*ckwit.

Rant over.

Review of Day of The Doctor

I must admit I was getting really excited during the lead up to watching this... so much so it was annoying the hell out of N. Ever since the end of the last episode where John Hurt was revealed to be a previously unknown and forgotten “War” Doctor I was mightily intrigued to see what was going to happen.

Well last Saturday we finally got to see if the reality lived up to the hype and if I am brutally honest I felt a little bit underwhelmed.

What was good was the dynamic between the three Doctors... although I have to admit I do prefer David Tennant's incarnation as compared to Matt Smith's. John Hurt was great chastising his successors and he brought a dishevelled weariness to the role. The brief scenes of the Daleks attacking Gallifrey were very Terminatoresque and were of exceptional quality, unfortunately there wasn't enough of them.

However the actress portraying Queen Elizabeth I was rubbish and there was no chemistry between her and David Tennant. Jenna Coleman as Clara was her usual know all character which I find irritating. There was a neat way of shoehorning Billie Piper into the plot by making her the interface with the bomb.

But what was great was getting to see Tom Baker again after so many years, his distinctive voice being heard before his actual appearance. Fabulous. And lastly getting a glimpse of Peter Capaldi.

Great stuff but maybe could have been better.

Rating: 8/10

Wendy Hurrell vs Lucy Verasamy... Battle of The Weather Girls!

Battle of the weather girls... I know which one I prefer and it isn't roll-your-eyes Wendy!

Anyway I thought I would put it to the vote (if anyone cares to bother). Look over to the top right corner!

This is going to be good... I hope!

I must say I am really looking forward to this Saturday's Day of The Doctor.

And I'm sure there are going to be some surprising twists. We've had a taster with the six minute minisode starring 8th Doctor Paul McGann - so I might stick my neck out and say we will see all the surviving Doctors as well as the Peter Capaldi regeneration.

No doubt I am completely wrong!

"2nd rate economy"

I am sick to bloody death on critics saying "if a third runway isn't built" or "if a high speed rail link isn't constructed" or something else isn't done... then Britain will become a second rate economy.

Maybe it is true (in fact I'm sure it would be true in a lot of cases)... but it is boringly predictable that some f*cker has to say it again and again!

Nope we won't do this project. WHOOSH!!! London instantly loses out to Frankfurt (for example). Rubbish.

Rant over.

Glasgow 2014: G4S given stewarding role at Commonwealth Games

"A security firm which admitted its handling of the London Olympics was a "humiliating shambles" is to provide stewarding at the Commonwealth Games.
G4S is one of 19 companies enlisted by organisers Glasgow 2014 to help police at the event.
The firms will provide stewarding and security at the games venues and other sites, such as the athletes village.
G4S paid £70m in compensation to the London games organising committee which used soldiers to plug security gaps.
G4S came under severe criticism ahead of the 2012 Olympics, when it emerged that it had failed to recruit and train enough of the guards it had promised for the event." -- BBC News website
You have got to be kidding!! What retarded f*ckwit decided to give these pricks the contract. I give up!!!
Rant over

When Hannah Montana goes bad...

Is it a backlash against her former alter ego? A rebellion to being squeaky clean?

B*ll*cks is it...

It's just some cynical corporate marketing campaign to eke more Mileyage out of Ms Cyrus.

And I wish she would stop sticking her tongue out!

Rant over.

Go on Amazon... wipe out businesses that deserve to be wiped out

I have absolutely nothing against bricks and mortar shops - they certainly don't deserve to be crushed by Amazon.

It is terrible seeing town centres being systematically and cynically destroyed by the Internet giant which made me think... why can't they obliterate low life scum like estate agents or plumbers?

It would be nice to see a few less slimey 3 series sales men or shaven headed Essex types "who did that pipework mate?"

Go on Amazon set up an estate agents and a plumbing division. Deliberately operate at a loss and drive the f*ckers out of business!

Rant over.

Kickstart Morph

Nice to see Aardman Animations asking for donations via Kickstarter to make twenty brand new one minute episodes of Morph.

Even though they have received critical acclaim all over the world for their stop motion animated films and surely must have made a shedload of cash they still resort to scrounging £75,000 off of the public rather than put their hands in their own pockets!

Tight fisted b*st*rds.

Also how can it cost so much to move a plasticene man a small amount take a photo and then do it again a few thousand times? Total b*ll*cks.

Rant over.

Helen Flanagan: "I'm not a talentless bimbo..."

Errr... Yes you are.

You can clearly see there is nothing behind the eyes. Helen Flanagan is undoubtedly the thickest person in Britain.

Rant over. 


Hooray! Another year with no trick or treaters. That means I can eat all the choccies we had ready to give away.

More Bigfoot Files

I caught the second episode of this light weight series the other day. This chapter  focused on the North American sasquatch. We saw various rednecks who had supposedly come face to face with one of these hairy giants including one idiot who had apparently shot a juvenile bigfoot dead!

Of course the DNA expert conducted his usual tests on various hair samples donated by several different witnesses and the inevitable disappointing results came back. Sasquatch = black bear!

Okay... unsurprising but what hacked me off were the two bozos who banged on trees to attract bigfoots (or should that be bigfeet?) We got to hear a supposed bigfoot in the distance banging a reply back!

"They're coming this way! Several of them" said redneck no.1. But did we get to see anything? Of course not. That sequence ubruptly ended and we were back in the vet bloke's car.

What a waste of bloody time!!!

Rant over.

BT adverts (the ones with the students)

I don't like these adverts... and I particularly don't like the bloke in the middle.

Rant over.

I couldn't work at John Lewis...

Have you noticed how the majority of shop assistants at John Lewis and Waitrose are all of a certain type?

They all look about twelve years old and the blokes all have the same floppy hairstyles.

Very strange!

Rant over.

G4S... how to be incompetent at everything

And so it goes on!

The world's shittiest company is at it again. This time it has been suspended from running a South African prison because it's employees have been accused of assaulting and torturing inmates. And what does the dickhead in charge of G4S Africa say?

"I wasn't aware of any wrongdoing"... Even after reports were shown to have been made about the abuse three years ago to their management.

Again I say... Shutdown this disgustingly incompetent and shambolic organisation. Who the f*ck in their right mind would give them a contract to run anything?

Rant over.

Big Foot Files

I love all this sort of stuff... does the yeti/sasquatch/bigfoot exist? But what annoyed me about the first programme in this new Channel 4 series was the automatic conclusion that the yeti is a hybrid bear dating back 40,000 years.

It may well be true but the DNA results could have been backed up by an ursine expert. How could such a bear survive? What would it eat? How did it come to be there? All these questions were overlooked and not even mentioned.

A bit lacking but I will watch the rest no doubt!

Rating: 6/10

Fiscal cliffs and debt ceilings etc...

Talk about leaving things to the last minute! It seems that US politicians always suddenly wake up and decide they better do something about their economy and budgets a matter of hours before these deadlines of disaster. Why not sort something out a few weeks earlier... or am I missing something?

Rant over. 

Yawn... it's Sebastian Vettel


Does anybody like this bloke? 


How to kill a sport in four years... look no further than Sebastian Vettel.

Rant over.

Convenient timing Gary!

Well well... "Sir" Gary Barlow will be releasing his first solo album for 14 years in November just as The X Factor reaches its climax. Bit of a coincidence isn't it? And what's the betting he performs a song from it live on the show! Subtle as a brick GARY.

Rant over.

Greg Davies

Another individual who continuously appears in comedy panel quiz shows. He thinks he is funny... HE ISN'T!!!

Rant over.

Micky Flanagan

Everytime you switch on the TV and there is a panel based comedy quiz programme being shown you can bet your life that this f*cker is on it... talk about el desperado to get his ugly moosh everywhere.

Rant over.

Marvel's Agents of Shield

Two episodes in and I'm still undecided whether I really like Marvel's Agents of Shield. The idea is great and the way it slots in with the films is original. There are plenty of references to Iron Man, Thor, Captain America and The Hulk. In fact there are probably too many references shoe horned in... as it becomes quite noticeable and rather clunky. Agent Coulson (the boss) is by far the best character (there is something mysterious about his "death" in The Avengers) but here is the let down - the other characters are utter sh*te! Particularly the two British sounding scientists who are so annoying you wish someone would shoot them. The action bloke, the sassy wisecracking do we trust her girl and the silent oriental woman are almost equally CRAP.

It's a shame because I really want to enjoy this series. Hopefully it will get better, but it does underline the need for decent actors.

Rating: 8/10 (acting except Coulson - 4/10)


This is a strangely addictive TV programme. Ridiculously over the the top and completely unbelievable it still holds your attention mainly because all the characters are dodgy. It makes a change to have all the key protagonists breaking the law - left, right and centre. The only bit that irks me is the constant shagging in cupboards between the President and Olivia Pope.

Definitely worth a watch.

Rating: 8/10


I have never understood why certain people are fascinated by disfiguring themselves with unsightly tattoos... but as for having them inked on their face like the above retard - simply beggars belief!

What a state!!

Rant over.

Red Ed's energy price freeze

I love the response from Centrica's boss to Milliband's gas and electricity price freeze policy. What was it the prick said? Oh words to the effect that the industry will be starved of investment for much needed improvements and that the country could face blackouts. Hang on a minute! Apparently gas and electricity prices have increased by 39% and 17.5% respectively since 2007 so why the hell have the b*st*rd energy companies not done anything to invest in the last 7 years? Well I think we know the answer to that question? Line their own pockets maybe? After all they are running a cartel and really do not give a f*ck about their captive customers.

Rant over.

Forever the underdog...

And another thing that gets on my bloody wick is these Scottish tourism adverts with the Braveheart music. What the hell is all that about? It feels like a subliminal message about the coming vote on independence... FREEDOM!!!

B*ll*cks more like!

Rant over.

Mango Chutney

I must have mango chutney with my favourite chicken tikka masala but why is it every time I go to get the jar out of the fridge I always find there is only a scraping at the bottom? EVERY BLOODY TIME!!!

Rant over.

Peppa Pig World

A couple of weeks ago we took the girls on a trip to Peppa Pig World which is situated down near Southampton. And I must say we all thoroughly enjoyed it. The whole experience is perfectly geared towards pre-school children with about eight or nine rides suitable for children of all ages. As we were there during the week and most older children had returned to school we didn't have to wait long to get on any of the attractions. My only criticisms would be the cost of a sandwich and a packet of crisps and the continuous repetition of the Peppa Pig theme tune over the PA system.

We sensibly decided to stay over night at a hotel rather than return the same day however we were astonished at the number of people who had checked in as the place was heaving... all elderly of course!

Rating: 9/10

Pointless remakes...

I watched the trailer to the new rebooted Robocop film just now... and I thought to myself "What is the bloody point?"

The original is a superb cult classic that can't really be bettered and this looked: PATHETIC!

Please can someone come up with something new?

Rant over.

Iron Man 3

I must say I was pretty disappointed with this lazy effort of a sequel. The only saving grace was the charisma of Robert Downey Jr... but even that is beginning to wear thin. Most of the characters were rubbish including a completely underused Ben Kingsley as The Mandarin except of course he wasn't what he seemed which screws up the fact that he is a major villain in the comic book. Not good. Guy Pearce was completely underwhelming and Gwyneth Paltrow irritates the hell out of me.


What Remains

Just watched the concluding episode of What Remains and what started as an intriguing slow burn whodunit degenerated into an over the top kill fest. All the characters turned out to be bat sh*t crazy and the last 10 minutes ended up with everybody killing each other. Apart from the alcoholic journalist's nutcase son whose subplot evaporated.

I knew that bow and arrow would play a part though.


Rating: 9/10 to begin with dropping to 6/10 at the very end.


Or to be exact those highly annoying micro thin plastic bags you put them in along with other sorts of fruit in supermarkets. Firstly whenever you try to pull one off the roll alongside you always manage to pull off about twenty five instead and secondly you stand there for about six months trying to open the bloody thing! Rubbish.

Rant over.

Carol somebody...

Okay I admit it... and I blame N for making me watch it - but I've been viewing snippets of "Celebrity" Big Brother every now again and I was stunned to discover that the ugly bat in the photo below who is yet another talentless nonentity who sarcastically co-hosts Loose Women was once married to the mega rich ginger haired dickhead Chris Evans.

Was Evans drunk when he proposed? Because she looks well and truly as if she has been whacked by the ugly stick. My god the woman is repulsive in every way!

And to think he was married to Billie Piper... afterwards!

Rant over.

How much?

Soooo... tax avoiding Vodafone is selling its 45% stake in US telecoms company Verizon for a whopping £84 billion - which is bigger than the GDP of Hungary! Which beggars the question... how the f*ck can a phone company be worth more than a country? Utterly ridiculous. And the greedy tw*t in charge said once again the UK government won't get a penny in tax and that most of the windfall will go to the shareholders. But what about the tax rebate they received on the 4G bid. Can't we have that back?

Rant over.

Jamie Oliver takes the p*ss...

"TV chef Jamie Oliver has said young British people are "wet behind the ears" and European immigrants are "tougher" workers.The presenter, whose restaurants include the Jamie's Italian chain, said they would all have to close if there were no migrants to staff them."There wouldn't be any Brits to replace them," he said in an interview with Good Housekeeping magazine.Young British people were not good at "long hours in hot kitchens", he said.Oliver said that when he was in his 20s, it was normal for him to work 80 to 100 hours a week in the restaurant trade.He added: "But the EU regulation now is 48 hours, which is half a week's work for me. And they still whinge about it!"British kids particularly, I have never seen anything so wet behind the ears!"I have mummies phoning up for 23-year-olds saying to me, 'My son is too tired.' On a 48-hour week! Are you having a laugh?" -- BBC website

What a tosser... why would anyone want to work 20,000 hours a week for 36p an hour? Dickhead! It makes me really angry hearing someone as wealthy as Jamie Oliver making such insulting comments towards young British workers. There is too much exploitation by employers in this country.

Rant over.

Freak of the week... Lauren Harries

JEEZUS... What a mess. No talent. No personality and what the f*ck is it?

Ben Affleck: Batman

So... Ben Affleck will be playing the new Batman in the forthcoming Superman vs Batman or whatever they plan to call it.

Why do I feel underwhelmed by this news?

Celebrity Big Brother Archetype No. 2

There is always a presenter from Loose Women.

Celebrity Big Brother Archetype No. 1

There is always at least two "B" rate actors from either Coronation Street or EastEnders or BOTH!!

Under The Dome

It took me two evenings to completely watch the first episode of this new series based on the novel by Stephen King... and to be honest I'm not sure I can be bothered to watch the rest. Lost rip off is the immediate thought that sprang to mind. Various characters with unusual backgrounds and back stories cut off from the rest of the world is not exactly original - and when I read on the Internet (assuming it is true!) that the secret of the dome involves aliens I sighed in dismay. Pathetic.

Rating: 4/10

Queuing up to be nicked

What is the fascination with trying to smuggle drugs into Peru? Why Peru?? Apparently there is a prison especially dedicated to holding blackmailed British women (and there seems to be a helluva lot of them!)

And why does it take 50 years before any of them stand trial? None of it makes sense. And wouldn't you have thought that the Peruvian authorities would think there is a common thread and try and do something to stop the blackmailers? No... that would be too obvious.

Rant over.

"America is not a country. It's just a business. Now pay me."

I really enjoyed this film, although it is far from perfect. The acting is top notch, especially Brad Pitt and the dialogue well and truly grips you. The only things that disappointed me were the lack of story (okay a crucial point) and the way it ended in midair. Also I didn't understand the point of the late James Gandolfini's character (Mickey). We get some great scenes with him and then he abruptly disappears. The violence is exceptionally brutal and explosive but ultimately I was left wanting more...

Rating: 8/10

Horrible Hemel Hempstead

"Hemel Hempstead has been named the ugliest town in the United Kingdom. The Hertfordshire town which was developed after the Second World War gained 785 of more than 3000 votes cast on a website.

Sam Jordison, who was involved in the survey said: I know why Hemel did so well in the poll. I've been there once. And once was more than enough" -- The Daily Telegraph.

He's right... IT IS A SH*THOLE!!!

Rant over.

Thames W*nkers

"P*ss taking b*st*rds"... is the phrase that springs to mind!

Rant over.

More G4S incompetence

You wouldn't have thought the company G4S could stoop any lower... Not only did they make a titanic mess of running the security at London 2012. Conned the authorities on mischarging for tagged offenders. But now the scumbags have failed to check the credentials of a nutter they employed to undertake security work in Iraq, who subsequently murdered two colleagues in a drunken brawl.

Why aren't these incompetent b*st*rds shut down once and for all?

Rant over.

Screw tops...

Another one of the many things that nark me is trying to put a screw top back onto a container... They never ever go back on properly the first time. Always always end up on the skew EVERY BLOODY TIME!!!

Rant over.

Facebook adverts

I find it amusing glancing at the adverts that now appear on Facebook - usually for mobile phones or mobile phone networks... as there is always about 58,000 comments slagging the product or service off. Makes you wonder why the advertiser would bother?


The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

I'm not sure that they actually needed to make this new trilogy of films. Don't get me wrong I love Tolkien's novels but after the astounding brilliance of The Lord of The Rings was it really necessary to do it all again? My biggest issue is stretching a 300 page book very thinly into three films and adding new bits to the story (Radagast for example who wasn't even in The Hobbit). The acting doesn't seem to be as good either... or it actually maybe the script... the Rivendell scene was lacklustre and stilted with Christopher Lee being totally inanimate (okay I realise he is getting very old). The dwarves all blurred into one and were difficult to differentiate with the exception of Richard Armitage as Thorin.

It lacked a performance as good as Viggo Mortensen's in the original and the whole thing felt like inferior déjà vu (if there is such a term!)


Rating: 7/10

And the 12th Doctor is... Peter Capaldi

Superb... An older Doctor! I have never watched The Thick of It but everyone says he was brilliant in it, so I am really looking forward to Peter Capaldi making a completely new take on The Doctor. No more zany comedy please... Darkness is what we need.

Great stuff!

Machete advertises

I cannot believe cult "B" rate actor Danny Trejo has stooped to advertising Old El Paso tacos on the telly. Humiliating!

Rant over.

In the barbers again...

Good place to rant about things whilst you wait!

Don't you just hate it when the retard in front of you has some complicated hair cut that takes f*cking forever... compounded by the fact there is only one person cutting!

Rant over.

Stuffing things in drawers...

Okay this is a bizarre rant to say the least... but another thing that irks me is when you put away things in a drawer like papers or boxer shorts etc. and you inevitably overfill it and then something drops down at the back into the drawer below, gets caught up and jams that lower drawer. And when you eventually pull out the lower drawer - usually off its runners you can never get it back first time... it always goes back on the skew. And then an item sticking up in a lower drawer still, prevents you pushing it all the way back... It is at this point you wish you hadn't bothered.

Rant over.

Gypsy Danger

Pacific Rim

I must admit I do like giant robots fighting giant monsters (as barmy as that sounds). However I do appreciate decent acting and decent dialogue and Pacific Rim lacks the later. Apart from Idris Elba and the brilliant Ron Perlman everyone else pales into insignificance. I mean for chrissakes Sean Slater out of EastEnders - why the hell was he cast? And he was trying to put on an Australian accent and failing big time.

The robots or jaegars were very impressive and the carnage involved in the various combat scenes is top notch. The concept of two pilots in each jaegar who need to mind meld or "drift" is a great idea and adds depth to the story. I did enjoy the film but I did think it could have been better. It sort of reminded me of Independence Day but not as good.

Rating: 7/10

Behind closed doors...

Considering the ridiculous amount of time the TV cameras spent trained on this door... it was still more interesting than the two mannequins that finally stepped out of it.

Rant over.

Waiting for a lift

And another thing that hacks me off is when you are waiting for a lift and it stops at your floor stuffed full of people and you cannot get in... so you wait for the next one. And when the next one comes back, the doors open revealing the same f*ckers now heading in the opposite direction. Because the b*st*rds have deliberately hogged the lift to make sure they get to where they're going. Leaving you to wait FOREVER!!!

Rant over.

Bankrupt Detroit

So how can a major US city declare bankruptcy? I don't understand it... Surely Detroit should be given more money by the US government to pay off its debts. It's like the people who live there have been hung out to dry. Detroit is a city not a business. Bloody weird if you ask me.

Inverdale spot on

I love this comment by John Inverdale...

"Do you think Marion Bartoli's dad told her when she was little: 'You're never going to be a looker. You'll never be a Sharapova, so you have to be scrappy and fight'"

And then some non-entity politician, Maria Miller, Minister for Women and Equalities demands the BBC sack him... WHY? He's right... Bartoli has been well and truly walloped by the Ugly Stick.

I wish I was paid £600,000 pa for my comments!

Rant over.

Rowling outted

So J K Rowling turns out to be first time author "Robert Galbraith"... and is immediately catapulted from No. 5000 in the book charts to No. 1. Talk about a cynical publicity stunt. And it just shows you how your name counts when it comes to writing. The book could be a bucket of sh*te but it will still be a massive financial success.

But what I want to know is where the hell did she get the utterly ridiculous name, Cormoran Strike from? YOU'RE NOT WRITING HARRY BLOODY POTTER NOW!!!

Rant over.

Overpaid IPSA boss

Read this just now about Sir Ian Kennedy, the cretin who is recommending that MPs receive a 10% pay increase...

"Sir Ian is paid £700 a day and works on average two days a week, which he said added up to an annual salary of between £60,000 and the "high 70s" -- Daily Mail website.

What the f*ck does this idiot do to receive that kind of money? And what exactly did he do to receive a knighthood?

Rant over.

Apprentice Archetypes No. 5

And at least three of the finalists always have some kind of online business as part of their great plan. How original...

Unsavoury Salmond

Now don't get me wrong I am pleased that Andy Murray won Wimbledon today but what revolted me was that obnoxious anti English racist slug Alex Salmond unfurling a Scottish flag behind David Cameron. You only got a glimpse before the camera shot changed... but that was enough.

Did he buy his own ticket or was he given it? That's what I want to know.

Rant over.

Frosty chill has come over the studio: Wendy Hurrell caught on camera rolling her eyes after forecast on 10 O'Clock News

I love this report on the Daily Mail website...

  • Presenter Wendy Hurrell, 31, caught revealing face of thunder after report
  • Smile quickly faded as she rolled eyes and flicked hair on BBC London
  • Viewers took to Twitter to speculate as to where her anger was directed
  • Ms Hurrell later claimed she has been annoyed at technical problems

"The forecast was for blue skies and sunshine, but weathergirl Wendy Hurrell's reaction was a face of thunder.

The presenter was caught revealing her frustration shortly after her 10.30pm report on BBC London last night.

The 31-year-old had been all smiles as she predicted warm weather for London the rest of the week.

But when the camera remained on her, Ms Hurrell could be seen rolling her eyes and flicking her hair in an apparent display of contempt."

Viewers were quick to take to Twitter to speculate as to what had brought on the cold front as clips of the candid moment were posted on YouTube and Facebook. Some thought that her anger was directed at news anchor Riz Lateef. One wrote: 'OMG! Did anyone see the eye rolling from Wendy Hurrell at the end of the weather tonight. Tut tut! Me thinks you don't like Riz Lateef'


Another said: '@WendyHurrell you should wait till the camera is off you before you pull the 'I couldn't give a s***' face' '@WendyHurrell providing much amusement on this sofa with a post-weather eye roll and 'what evs' face,' wrote another.

Deary, deary me Wendy - put your foot in it didn't you?

Dolmio muppets

Another series of adverts that grate on me are those for Dolmio... what are those crappy pseudo muppets all about?... Rubbish.

Rant over.

Pampers Wipes

Since the twins were born we must have used about 238,000,000,000 of these bloody things... And do you know what really p*sses me off? Every time you pull one out, you "accidentally" pull TWO out. Obviously a cunning design which means you have to buy more of them! Bastards!!!

Rant over.

Apprentice Archetypes No. 4

There is always someone who immediately puts themselves forward as project leader but never gets to do it as the others never trust them.

Big Brother Archetypes No. 3

There is always a lingerie model (quite often a northerner or Irish) on the show as well as an infatuated dweeb.

You don't need talent to make money...

Today I couldn't help thinking how we will never see this years winner of The Voice again. No matter how good you are you need someone to pour money into your career and I really don't think anyone is going to splash the cash with Andrea Begley.

Following on from this I always found it appalling that 2010 X Factor winner Matt Cardle was basically p*ssed on by Simon Cowell in favour of 6th placed One Direction. Of course these five talentless f*ckwits are now all multimillionaires. Which is bloody galling. For instance the odious little prick at the top "Zayne" who "sings" about two words on every other song takes a share of £60,000,000 whilst Cardle who could actually sing well was completely sidelined. Totally unfair and bloody disgusting.

Rant over.


"We now know that you are entitled to £2950 for the mis-selling of ppi on your loan or credit card. To claim for free reply 'CLAIM' to this message."

Okay... so you are telling me a mysterious texter knows that I am owed nearly three grand? How... pray... would they happen to know this information? What a load of f*cking b*ll*cks. And you would have to be a retard to believe it!

Rant over. 

Man of Steel

I was really looking forward to seeing Man of Steel. I hadn't got around to seeing Iron Man 3 or Star Trek Into Darkness at the cinema but I was determined to see this reboot of Superman. I was particularly interested to see if there was going to be references to Batman or any of the other DCU characters for a possible Justice League set up.

Unfortunately there this none of this... And to be honest I found the film disappointing. It is a mish mash of Superman II, Independence Day and Star Trek (the previous one).

I think what mainly let's it down is the dialogue. It is basically bland and empty. Kevin Costner drones on saying the same thing in every scene he appears in. Amy Adams is utterly crap as Lois Lane and completely forgettable. Henry Cavill portrays Superman well enough but not as charismatically as Christopher Reeve probably because you don't see him in full Daily Planet Clark Kent mode until the very end. Russell Crowe is Russell Crowe but Michael Shannon makes an excellent General Zod.

The final battle scene is insanely OTT with Metropolis almost completely flattened which is ridiculous because Superman would avoid collateral damage. Thousands must have been slaughtered in the fall out but he doesn't seem to care.

This film could have been a lot better!

Rating: 6/10

Big Brother Archetypes No. 2

There is always a lesbian and at least two gay blokes.

No indication

And another thing that hacks me off is when you are driving and about to pull out of a side road and you are waiting for a gap in the traffic and then some stupid b*stard turns without indicating squandering your chance to pull out. GITS!

Rant over.

Big Brother Archetypes No. 1

There is always an aggressive black woman who complains, argues and hits someone and is thrown off the programme for intimidation (okay the throwing off bit hasn't happened yet on the latest series).

Murdoch divorce

I see the revolting Rupert Murdoch (aged 82) is divorcing his third wife, 38 years his junior, for whatever reason... but what I want to know is why did she marry the geriatric multi billionaire in the first place? Oh... okay... I seem to have answered my own question!

Rant over.

"Lego characters are getting angrier - and could be harming children's development"

"It's one of the few toys that's remained popular for more than a generation.

But even Lego characters have now come under fire after researchers found they are slowly becoming 'angrier'.

Christopher Bartneck, of New Zealand's University of Canterbury, has published research showing that Lego characters are becoming more conflict-oriented, and the human figures featured in Lego sets are getting angrier.

The study found that Lego figures most frequently feature happy or angry expressions, but since their introduction in 1975, the proportion of angry faces has been rising. 

The findings also raise questions about the role of the design of toys and its impact on children, say the researchers." -- Daily Mail website.

Is this bloke for real? Did someone commission and therefore pay this retarded tw*t to investigate angry faces on Lego men?? UNBELIEVABLE!!!

Rant over.